Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Sirius Trouble if the Merger is depending on Howard (Yawn) Stern

I still check in, but if I were paying for Sirius because of Howard Stern, this would be the time I'd be asking for my money back.

The newness of the swearing is over; he can't round up A-list guests because his numbers have dropped so much from his days on terrestrial radio; and frankly, success is killing the entertainment value of Howard Stern.

Now that he's living the Hamptons lifestyle, tooling between mansions, and happily set to be married, the angst, the danger and the edge are plain gone. The spark has dimmed from the (not so) shock jock's show.

Today the talk was about who Stern would invite to his wedding, and frankly, it was about as boring as hearing any stranger doing his wedding planning. AM talk radio was on fire by comparison.

And then, worse than the show itself, is what they call "The Wrap Up Show," in which producer Garry Dell'Abate (or more accurately, Dell'Aboring ) and John Hinds discuss the most "dramatic" moments of the show. And I thought postgame baseball analysis was dull.

Today the big question, stated breathlessly by Dell'Aboring, was: "Should Howard invite Lisa from his news team to his wedding, because she wishes she was marrying him?"

You couldn't even goof on them for being so serious about the topic. They just didn't have any real material to work with. Maybe this is their way of preparing listeners for his annual endless summer sabbatical of repeats.

And here's the real problem. Stern always had something or someone to be mad at: his program directors, the FCC, the women who never wanted him. But he's got everything he wants these days. He's got the money; he's got the girl; and he can say what he wants on the air.

His contract is running out, and the more I listen, the more I think that this time Stern will stride off into the Hamptons sunset, before he ends up even more boring and irrelevant than Imus.


Steve Dell'Abate said...


You must be high. Did you actually listen to the show? We know you've always had a sour taste for Howard ever since your on-air drilling years ago. Let it go! Your writings usually reek of jealousy, hate or payola (we all read The Fly). That's why your writing this blog and not your music column anymore. I have enjoyed some of your past work. I guess I just expected more. I do expect your writings to be fair and truthful. Let talk about some of what you missed from todays Stern show.

You must have been eating breakfest when Joan Rivers came in and talked about George Carlin. She listed her top 5 comedians(#1 Lenny Bruce). Joan is still very funny. Howard has been talking about his love for George Carlin since Monday. Great radio. Howard might not get the "A-list" people anymore but he's had a steady flow of stand-up comedians on the show. It is a comedy show.
You also missed a true comedy segment know as "The Lord of the Anal Ring Toss." This battle linked into your wedding comments. The winner of the ring toss competition would get an invite to Howard's wedding. That's why Lisa G(Howard 100 news) was offered the chance to join the competition. It was her only chance to attend the wedding. She declined the offer. I feel the show was anything but a yawn-fest. You know what your getting with Howard. If you want to hear boring morning radio, tune into Greg Kihn.

True Howard fans understand his comedy. We all can't relate to life in the Hamptons but who cares. His story is a true American story. Shock-jock(whatever) hits his jackpot. I feel his show is a steal at less then 50 cents a day.

I usually wouldn't comment on any blog but you pushed this Stern fans button. If that was your goal; success. Howard Stern is not for everyone(or you). That's why you have to pay for Sirius. But wait... your listening to Howard. You pay too. Your AM talk radio payola must cover your Sirius subscription. Way to work it Brad. We'll both enjoy the Stern yawnfest tomorrow.

Lets get it right Brad.
Look forward to your comments.
From a true fan. Loved your Music column. I feel the Mercury music column has suffered without you.
God Bless.

Eastman said...

Quite honestly I found your blog to be about as drab and dry as all the other useless fodder out there on the net. Stern has to do it everyday, you are writing here and there and you can't be more captivating? Stern is not for everyone, simply don't listen. Where do you get your facts also? His satellite numbers are massive and ever growing. Try reading the stock portfolio analysis, it will tell you how much he brings in listener-wise. I hope you have other talents then writing...

Sung said...

People still listen to Howard Stern? People actually pay money to listen to him, STILL?

I mean it's pretty obvious you’re a Stern fan Steve. The first sentence you typed to open your argument was, “You must be high.” This shows the lack of maturity you have and pretty much all the people who listen to Stern, including Stern himself. But that’s obviously not a surprise and I’m not talking about Stern.

Second, I have to agree – Stern’s comedy is something that’s only understood by his “true fans.” Anyone who understands that one doesn’t ALWAYS have to poke fun at pop culture and involve something sexual to meaningless games probably wouldn’t understand either. At a certain point, “shock jocks” become un-shocking. I’m still amazed how long he’s been on the air. I suppose mindless comedy doesn’t have limits.

You are a very angry person Steve. For you to be this upset over just one man’s opinion seems a little unusual considering there’s probably millions of similar opinions about Stern which is no where near as offensive as Brad’s.

Anonymous said...

"Stern is not for everyone, simply don't listen."

Well, Brad is not for everyone, so simply don't read.